It's like any other time, but not quite.
Whenever I leave a journal entry for too long, I have too much to say and never know where to start. But this is a million times worse because since the last time I wrote, Matt and I have taken 15 plane rides (without missing a single connection - a great feat!), visited 3 continents (body clock has been sacrificed and tricked numerous times by criss-crossing time zones – two nights ago we woke up at 4am unable to sleep another wink until 7am), went sailing twice in the gorgeous sea, boating on the Ottawa river and then again on Lake Ontario, drank champagne almost every night, met up with friends and family from my entire life (Matt did well to remember all their names and relations to me), met his friends and family (I think I’ve got the family members down pat, but then again I have a lot less to commit to memory in comparison), ate delicious cheese, bread, soups, deserts, bbq meat, seafood, on and on.
Backing up to the beginning of our trip: as we were driving up onto the on-ramp to get on the highway on our way to the Urumqi airport, we practically rammed into a car going down the ramp in the other direction!
We had to laugh, what else is there to do when little sights like that make up the high points of your day in China? It didn't matter anyways - we were outta there!
Our first stop was Jersey where Matt's father was being given a surprise retirement party. He had absolutely no idea that all this scheming and planning was taking place for the past year (even a separate bank account was opened to ensure the operation went uncovered!)
The theme was 60's Night and having not much selection in Urumqi in terms of 60's gear, Matt and I decided to go as two PLA officers, gold buttons and black cloth shoes, the works! I wasn't anxious to meet my father-in-law for the first time, but to be dressed up like a Communist - and believe you me, with my braided pigtails and sunglasses, I was even surprised at how 'Chinese' i looked - i was a bit, shall we say, excited.
The night went on without a hitch and there was even a live band made up of some of the teachers dressed up as The Beatles. The champagne and wine went down smooth, the food was absolutely delicious, the company fantastic.
Although having met him just a couple of hours before, it was an honour to see how he was so appreciated and revered in the community. After having dedicated himself to the education and well-being of so many students, it was amazing to see the successes he had achieved in his career, so much so that colleagues from the early years made efforts to come and show their support too.
After a few minutes of meeting me for the first time, after the shock of the surprise had sunk in, he turned to me in a serious way, looking intensely through his long curly wig and dark Beatles glasses, and said: "This is my home and i am surrounded by such loving friends."
And then without missing a beat, he asks me: "So where are you staying?" Uh oh, my mind goes into overdrive and i'm thinking, which, i didn't realize at the time, but i actually ended up saying aloud, "with YOU!" (if you don't mind, which i definitely said in my mind). Everyone got a good chuckle out of that.
It was a great ice-breaker for what would be a marvelous weekend.
We sailed, had picnics on the beach, an outdoor bbq overlooking the sunset, attended a live outdoor jazz festival, cycled to the coastline. And those were just the bonus bits apart from meeting and getting to know my new family.
Next stop was across the Atlantic (Matt's first time!) to Ottawa, where we had a mini-party for some old family friends from Ottawa and Cornwall.
My mother is a nonstopable machine when it comes to cooking and hosting guests, and this time wasn't an exception. After some medical appointments and an allergy test for me, hanging out a bit at home, we then headed off to Toronto to be bombarded with relatives and stuffed silly with food and drink.
On July 23rd we had a somewhat traditional Chinese wedding banquet, surrounded by 140 of our fond friends and family from all parts of my life. For some, it was a chance to be reunited again with long-lost friends and colleagues, great big hugs and shrieks of laughter were constantly had and heard throughout the evening.
In all, it was a great event right down to the teary-eyed speeches; my dad gave his all-time favourite song a go: Frank Sinatra's MY WAY. He changed some of the lyrics so that it become ".... they did it their way" - everyone loved it!
Afterwards, we showed some Uyghur dancing on the big TV screen to encourage everyone to dance. The Uyghur scarves and carpets were a great hit also! Even though i was weary about sending them home from Urumqi, it was definitely worth it in the end.
The only unfortunate incident was that the restaurant forgot to pick up the cake from the bakery and by the time they remembered, the bakery was closed. Poor Mom had gone to great lengths to ensure that the cake was just perfect (heart-shaped size, lettering, etc.)
Oh well, a bunch of family members met the next morning for dim sum where after plates of greasy dumplings and sticky rice, we worked our way through the ten-pound mango cheesecake!
That same morning, Matt and I did the traditional tea ceremony for my grandparents. A big part of having the Chinese wedding banquet in Toronto was for my grandparents, who will be unable to come to Xinjiang in September.
They were thrilled to see all of us gathered happily together before the inevitable reality of us going back to China for an indefinite period. And so for the tea ceremony, it was just something we wanted to do to make them feel like they're a part of our special union.
Unfortunately, none of us knew really what to do so in reality it ended up being this ordeal where everyone was shouting instructions but nobody was listening, and where Matt and I were looking at each other unsure of what to do but desperately wanting to do it 'right'.
In the end, we carefully poured hot water out of the thermos into the delicate porcelain tea cups (my two grandmothers don't drink tea so the 'tea serving ceremony' was actually a 'hot water serving ceremony'), and with both hands offered them the cup.
In turn, each grandparent gives us a red envelope with money inside. Unsure of what to do next, they took a tiny sip from their cup, posed for the flashing cameras, got up and brought it back to the kitchen sink where they rinsed the rest out.
It took less than a minute in total, but I'm glad we did it, even though it may not have been perfect or complete to traditional Chinese standards.
With all the family obligations combined with the lack of time and the need for sleep, we didn't get to see much of Toronto. However we did manage to rent a somewhat large barge (think pleasure cruise) to see a bit of Lake Ontario. Not exactly our first choice, but that was all that was available at the time.
Did some shopping at MEC, Chapters, had lunch with Anice, and then off we were again to Jersey! But of course not before bidding farewell to relatives. Grandma, especially, was overcome with emotion and her last wishes to me were: "I'm not getting any younger. Have lots of children as soon as you can."
Across the Atlantic again and as we touched down, Jersey greeted us was a downpour of water which we were told had not let up all day. Still, there is beauty through the fog and mist when you are looking out into fresh Jersey cow pastures and the crashing sea waves.
The following day, Matt took me to 'the secret beach' where you have to make your way through rocky crevasses and a deep dark tunnel in order to get to this secluded beach. Reachable only during low tide (or else the tunnel is full of water and impenetrable), there is gorgeous smooth sand and tall vertical caves that have been carved out by the powerful waves over time.
Stunningly beautiful, it was one of my favourite (mental) snapshots of our trip.
My parents arrived on the island the next day, and as suspected, everyone got along fabulously. There were lots of preparations, peppered with quick trips to the airport to pick up yet another family member from Liverpool, Plymouth, Leeds, London, etc. There was this huge energy buzzing throughout the house, like this enormous crescendo of excitement that was all to be let out on Friday, July 29th.
Alas, it came. And at 12 noon at Jersey's registrar's office, Matt and I were officially married in a short 'n' sweet ceremony. My father walked me down the aisle - well, we actually Uyghur danced it! - and suddenly, there I am standing at the front of the aisle, shaking with excitement and total happiness.
The feeling that overcame me as i was repeating the declarations is something that is and will be utterly etched in my memory forever. Those of you who know me to be a bit of an sentimental sap, I am proud to say that i was consistent by being incapable of keeping my eyes dry. Hey, i wasn't the only one!
Claire, Matt's younger sister, was our chauffeur for the day. She owns a beautiful baby-blue 'Moggy' which she polished and decorated with fabric to match my dress. It was the perfect day weather-wise also, as it was the only day out of the entire week where there was no rain. Just a few days before, Jersey received so much rain that the meteorologist declared that the island had received the equivalent rainfall in 24 hrs to what it would normally get in a month!
But we were lucky (as we’ve been told so many times for so many different reasons) and following a gorgeous reception at a local hotel, we gathered to wine and dine at the family home in the evening.
Speeches were made, numerous toasts had, and my dad attempted to sing "My Way" again, although without the words this time, and even though he forgot some of the lyrics, mixed them up, and then completely went blank, his efforts were well appreciated by all.
Leaving the next day for a dinner-party with Matt’s friends at the Lightship Restaurant in London, we left an entourage of loving family members at the departure gate, all waving us on towards our married life. Another snapshot memory.
Three more flights in a row and it’s back to life here. Everyone's talking about coming out to Urumqi for the Xinjiang wedding in September so the pressure's on to put on a good show.
Admittedly, it was nice to step off the plane and walk right into your own wedding (we have a lifetime of thanks to give to our parents for organizing such fantastic parties in Toronto and Jersey). All we had to do was smile and enjoy, and that we most certainly did!
Ok, I’ve really gotta stop here, running out of writing steam...
One last memory i will remember from this trip:
The morning after our marriage was official. We spent our wedding night in a tent in the garden, real comfy and totally warm, and as we awoke from the sun's strong rays, stepped out of the tent and strolled into the kitchen, i was greeted with a jolly "Good morning, MRS. THORNINGTON!"
Wow, so it wasn't just a dream. I do have to admit i've already practiced my new signature ;)
This may be the end of our whirlwind tour, but only the beginning of so much more.
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